X-Mass Day Recap

Historically, I have not been a fan of holidays, at least, not since I was a wee child. Once you are no longer the center of attention of the Holiday Season, it's hard to get excited about cold weather, unexpected winter expenses, and traveling to visit family that you might not be too interested in seeing just yet. I think most people go through this phase during the Cool Years: roughly, 16 - 30. It's when a human is most concerned with being cool and, more to the point, the most prone to behaving childish.

This year, things were markedly different for me, beginning with Thanksgiving with my Mom and Christmas with my Dad. There were a lot of other family members involved too, and what (exactly) about those two trips I enjoyed I can't exactly say for sure. All I know is that the usual sensations of wanting to get back home as soon as possible were not a part of this year's celebrations, to the point that I spent all day yesterday (after I got home) listlessly cleaning and trying to figure out what to do.

I can't exactly say that I'm a fan of the Holiday Season (as it's celebrated in the US), but this year I feel like something in me changed. Or, perhaps, it wasn't the holiday per se, but rather the act of spending time with my family that really set it off. I've been living on my own now for 15 years, and in that time I've spent only a very little time with my family. Part of that comes from different interests and pursuits: I'm in school, working on the long and hard road toward becoming some sort of academic, with all of the usual extreme-left tendencies and nuances that come with having been involved with bands and bars and that particular kind of subculture, while most of my family is involved in raising kids, keeping a job, and maintaining their sanity.

It's not that we don't understand each other, or even that we can't appreciate what the other does; it's just that, on a practical level, we don't relate to each other. It's hard to know what they're going through when I've never had to deal with babies on a day-to-day basis. Conversely, how many members of my family could make a 'zine from scratch, or know the differences between punk sub-genres?

The point being, I had a great time this year, and I don't know if that's because I've matured, or because they've gotten more interesting as people, friends, and family members. For the time being, I'm going to continue to believe that it's them and not me. I'm not quite ready to face the truth yet, anyway.